When my story begins: I was a happy and healthy wife and mom of 20 month-old twin boys when I had abnormal bleeding. After six months and a misdiagnosis, I was told I had cancer on October 26th, 2012. Unbeknownst to me, I had tested positive for high risk HPV a year earlier and my provider did not find it necessary to make any changes to my screening schedule. Luckily I had symptoms and followed my gut. Otherwise, I may not be here today.
My treatment: Radical hysterectomy and removal of 17 lymph nodes. Followed by 5 weeks of chemotherapy and external radiation.
What was most difficult for me: Asking for help. I am a very independent woman and accepting help with everything from caring for my children to helping me shower, was extremely hard for me. I also struggled with the emotions of those around me. After the initial day or two of crying, I shut down emotionally and focused on kicking cancer’s butt. This made it very difficult for me to handle everyone else’s crying and fear. I finally realized that being selfish, and being physically and emotionally vulnerable were my right while fighting for my life.
What I did to help myself: I found that having my children taken care of by family (husband, grandparents, siblings) made me feel more at ease so things were as normal as possible for them. Thankfully, I was surrounded by an amazing family. The other big thing for me was eating food that helped me heal. That was incredibly important to me. Again, I had incredible friends and family that listened. They cooked healthy, organic, anti-cancer foods that made me feel like I was doing my part to fight this nasty disease in my body. Identifying these things and voicing them to my caregivers was instrumental.
Life after cancer: Two years later, I am finally coming out of the cancer fog. It took me a long time to adjust back into my own life when I felt like a completely different person. Now, I have a new perspective that helps me appreciate the little things, take care of my body and see life as a true gift.
What I want other women to know: Be your own advocate. Knowledge is power, especially at a time when you feel so helpless and vulnerable. Ask questions every step of the way and demand answers. If you feel like something is wrong, persist until you get a response that satisfies you. I also want women to know that there is life after cancer. It may take a long time, and you will never be the same, but you can be better – stronger, more grateful and more purposeful in your life. Use therapists, your doctors, and your support system. Reclaim your life!!
“The things that go wrong for you have a lot of potential to become part of your gift to the world”
– Krista Tippet