How my story begins: For close to a year, I was having some pelvic discomfort, some vaginal bleeding between periods, increased fatigue, frequent dull backaches and at times just did not feel 100%. I had a normal pap and pelvic exam completed by my family doctor within that year but when the symptoms worsened I went back to the doctor and was told that I had what appeared to be chronic cervicitis (irritation of my cervix) and was told that the cervix must have been irritated either through intercourse, or that I perhaps had caused the issues myself from using certain products bathing or feminine products.
My doctor did not approach the subject in a very supportive manner and I left that appointment embarrassed at the doctors line of questioning and wishing that I had not even gone to see him about the issues I was continuing to have. I had yet another appointment after continued issues and was told again that there was nothing serious going on and that the issue may now be a benign nabothian cyst on my cervix but not to worry because I was told that they are not life threatening but that if it continued to be an issue that it could be removed through electrocautery ablation or with the use of liquid nitrogen to freeze it. I went home yet again feeling like there was more to what was going on with me and that something was seriously wrong.
Then approximately four months later, I had an episode where large amounts of blood came out of me and I called my doctor's office to see if I could get in that day or the next and was told that my doctor was on vacation but I could see one of his colleagues.
She took one look at my cervix and told me that is was extremely friable (delicate and easily damaged) and that I needed to go over to the hospital that same day for a vaginal ultrasound. She was very supportive and really listened to me and I was thankful that she took my continued issues seriously.
I went over there right after my appointment with her and didn’t expect to hear back with any results that day or even the next. I was very surprised when she called that evening to let me know that the ultrasound had shown a mass on my cervix. She explained that she would contact a gynecologist in the area to get me in as soon as possible for a colposcopy and biopsy to confirm what it was. She did mention that it was concerning.
This was on a Thursday evening that she told me about the mass and then by Monday of the following week I had the biopsy done and when it came back I was told that I had squamous cell carcinoma of the cervix and that I was being referred to a Gynecologic Oncologist for further workups and staging of the cancer and to determine a treatment plan.
It was the Gynecologic Oncologist that completed the exploratory surgery that including checking out my bowel and bladder. I also had MRI, CT Scan, and PET Scans and bloodwork. I was told that due to both the size and location of the tumor and the extent to which it had entered the pelvic sidewall that I was not a good candidate to have a hysterectomy to cut it out, as they were concerned that they may not be able to get clear margins. The plan instead was for radiation (both external and internal) as well as chemotherapy to get rid of the tumor.
I was then referred to a Radiation Oncologist for that aspect of my cancer journey.
Life before my diagnosis: My life was much more carefree, with fewer worries about what tomorrow might bring. I was working full-time as a registered nurse and raising two young children as a single mom. I enjoyed spending time with my children and friends, and overall, I felt like life was going well.
How I felt after diagnosis: I was initially shocked to find out I had cervical cancer that had also spread to several lymph nodes, especially since I’d been regular about getting my annual Pap smears and pelvic exams. It felt like someone had punched me in the stomach and knocked the wind out of me. Yet, I wasn’t entirely surprised that something was wrong, because I’d seen my doctor more than once in the past year due to recurring “below the belt” issues: pain, unusual bleeding, and just not feeling completely well. I was also frustrated; I’d had a normal Pap test earlier that year but continued experiencing symptoms, and it wasn’t until my condition worsened that I was finally diagnosed.
Telling my family and friends: At the time of my diagnosis, my son and daughter were visiting my Mom and Stepdad in Canada. They were only supposed to be there for a couple of weeks over summer vacation but ended up staying for almost six weeks. I needed to undergo exploratory surgery right away, followed by radiation and chemo soon after, so my parents offered to care for the kids during the initial phase of my cancer journey until it was time for school to start back up.
This was a blessing in some ways but also very emotionally difficult for everyone. I had to break the news to my Mom and Stepdad over the phone, and they then explained the situation to my children in person, comforting them before I spoke to them myself. There were many tears over the phone, and when my children returned home, they seemed worried and scared. One of them even asked if I was going to die, which was an incredibly tough topic to discuss.
My treatment: I had external beam radiation therapy (EBRT) five days a week for several weeks and also had five rounds of internal radiation high-dose rate brachytherapy. I also had once-a-week IV chemo treatments with Cisplatin while going through radiation treatments.
How I felt after treatment: I was glad when my treatment was completed but I did experience moments of anxiousness and worry prior to each follow-up scan or appointment that the cancer had or was going to come back. I also felt that I had changed in many ways; parts of me were more brave and strong and a part of me became more cautious. The long-term affects of treatment have been difficult at times and some have remained after all these years and have become a part of my new normal.
What was most difficult for me: The fear of the unknown that a cancer diagnosis brings and the ongoing concern that it could come back. When I was going through treatment, not being able to do everything that I wanted to do with my children due to fatigue and side-effects of treatment was very difficult.
What I did to help myself: I looked for other women who were also going through cervical cancer so that I felt less alone in my journey and I joined gynecological cancer support group through the cancer center. I attended a conference in California for cervical cancer awareness and prevention and met fellow cervical cancer survivors including Tamika Felder, the founder of Cervivor. I participated in events for cervical cancer awareness, which helped me feel more informed and empowered. And I went to Disneyland with my Mom and children after I finished treatment to celebrate life.
My life after cancer: I continued my career as a Registered Nurse, I raised two amazing children who are now young adults and have both graduated from university. I continue to enjoy exploring new places and have set a goal of traveling more. I love sunsets and appreciate everyone that I get to enjoy!
Where I am today: Even though I have been cancer-free for almost 18 years now, there are lasting impacts, both physical and emotional, that remain. I have learned to appreciate each day — good, bad, or otherwise — and consider myself blessed to still be here to tell my story.
What I want other women to know: I want other women to know that you are not alone. Don't be afraid to ask your health care professionals questions and to question their answers if something continues to not feel right. Stay informed and share your story as you never know whose life you may impact as a result. Encourage your friends, sisters, daughters, mothers, and aunts to have their cervical cancer screenings done regularly.
How I will try to help others: I will try to help others by sharing my story, advocating to raise awareness for cervical cancer prevention, and being supportive of others that are going through their own cervical cancer journey.
Any additional information you'd like to share: CERVIVOR ROCKS!!!