Remembering Ita

I met Ita when we were little girls in school, she was a year older than me and a class ahead; frankly, I don’t think we talked much at that age but then we were tweens and teens things changed. Not only were we in the same school but now we were both in the same Pathfinders Club (if you are wondering, it’s like a Christian coed scouts club); we had lots of fun during those years and one thing I do remember clearly, she was always smiling and making jokes! She was great to hang out with!

The years passed and obviously, we outgrew Pathfinders and as expected everyone moves on and pursues their own interests. I would continue to see Ita every now and then at church activities or at her family’s hardware store as my family was building a house. She was always smiling and asking how things were going and we would chat for a while about friends we hadn’t seen in a while and such, it was always great to see her. She was just one of those people that was easy to talk to, super friendly and, I kid you not, she was always smiling. Life took us in different directions and we would not see each other or talk for years. Thanks to Facebook, we reconnected at some point and I could see she was doing well and was still showing the world that ear to ear smile.

I was concerned the first time I saw she was taken to an emergency room due to a hemorrhage and reached out to her best friend because I knew that scenario too well and I feared the diagnosis; a few days later it was confirmed: Ita had cervical cancer. I can’t even describe the feeling you have when someone you know is diagnosed with the same thing you had. This illness is something you don’t want to share, something you don’t want anyone else to have. This illness is not chickenpox; you don’t want “your other children” to get it and get it over with… You just don’t want anyone else to have to go through this. I knew what she was in for and I didn’t want this for her.

I don’t know how this happened but my thoughts went from fear to “let’s get her to Cervivor School Puerto Rico so she knows she is not alone in this”. I wanted her to be surrounded by other women with similar diagnosis and hear stories of hope and meet survivors; thanks to her great friends, Ita came to Cervivor School Puerto Rico and we reconnected.

Maria and Ita at Cervivor School: Puerto Rico 11/19/16

She looked thinner and weaker than I remembered but she still had that great smile! I asked her how she felt and she said “¡En victoria!”; she still had it in her, she was still that ray of light!

That is exactly who Ita was: a ray of light! Ever since I can remember she has been a ray of light! I honestly cannot recall a time I saw her without that smile. I look at her photos and there it is — the big smile. She was so positive and hopeful and this cancer did not change that in her; not matter how bad it got, she still smiled and cared for others. She set the bar high for the rest of us.

I wanted Ita to heal. I wanted her to be a survivor, I wanted her to be done with chemo and recover her strength and live a long life. I wanted that so badly, her friends and family wanted that so badly for her; but cervical cancer took Ita from this world.

As her family and friends say their final goodbyes; I find myself an ocean away thinking of how I will remember this girl I met in my childhood and with whom I shared many fun times but also a bond I never wanted to share with anyone: cervical cancer. I know I’m going to remember her smile, that’s just impossible to forget; but I will also remember her as a woman of incredible faith, a fearless warrior, my brave Cervivor sister who didn’t lose this fight but showed us how to fight with strength, faith, hope, and a smile in the face. RIP querida guerrera, until we meet again.

Maria Franklin is a Cervivor School graduate and ambassador. Read her story here

Celebrating milestones after cervical cancer

Untitled design10/10/2015: the day I turned 44. Pretty amazing I think… for me, celebrating another birthday is pretty amazing!
In the morning of my 44th birthday I look at the mirror and see a few changes: my unmanageable hair has more grays than I can count (thank God for hair color and balayages and whatever new thing my stylist does to hide them!); I notice a few more wrinkles although not too bad for my age; the stubborn age spots that won’t go away courtesy of many years of sunbathing at Playa Azul; oh, and of course, the extra pounds… Yes, I have changed a lot in 44 years, but looking at the mirror I notice something else, the happiness that radiates from my face. Yes, I am in fact happy, and today, I am happy to be alive and I am grateful, so, so grateful!
I find birthdays are a great opportunity for reflection; this is not something I did when I was younger but after you are told “you have cancer” birthdays take a whole new meaning. Cancer almost killed me at 27, I was literally told to decide if I wanted to be resuscitated or not because my condition was not improving. Most people don’t realize that, when you have cancer, you end up fighting a few different battles all at once; there’s the cancer (those bad cells multiplying like crazy trying to make your body their home), then there is the side effects of the treatments (the constant puking, the incredible weakness, the insomnia, the constant bathroom tours because the radiation pretty much messes up all the areas around the cervix); and then there are the complications that come with the illness (the infections, blood clots, anemia, etc.) Fighting cancer is not an easy fight, there are too many things to do and watch for, but it is a fight that you put all your effort into just for a chance to live one more day.

Read Maria’s full post.