Remembering Ita

I met Ita when we were little girls in school, she was a year older than me and a class ahead; frankly, I don’t think we talked much at that age but then we were tweens and teens things changed. Not only were we in the same school but now we were both in the same Pathfinders Club (if you are wondering, it’s like a Christian coed scouts club); we had lots of fun during those years and one thing I do remember clearly, she was always smiling and making jokes! She was great to hang out with!

The years passed and obviously, we outgrew Pathfinders and as expected everyone moves on and pursues their own interests. I would continue to see Ita every now and then at church activities or at her family’s hardware store as my family was building a house. She was always smiling and asking how things were going and we would chat for a while about friends we hadn’t seen in a while and such, it was always great to see her. She was just one of those people that was easy to talk to, super friendly and, I kid you not, she was always smiling. Life took us in different directions and we would not see each other or talk for years. Thanks to Facebook, we reconnected at some point and I could see she was doing well and was still showing the world that ear to ear smile.

I was concerned the first time I saw she was taken to an emergency room due to a hemorrhage and reached out to her best friend because I knew that scenario too well and I feared the diagnosis; a few days later it was confirmed: Ita had cervical cancer. I can’t even describe the feeling you have when someone you know is diagnosed with the same thing you had. This illness is something you don’t want to share, something you don’t want anyone else to have. This illness is not chickenpox; you don’t want “your other children” to get it and get it over with… You just don’t want anyone else to have to go through this. I knew what she was in for and I didn’t want this for her.

I don’t know how this happened but my thoughts went from fear to “let’s get her to Cervivor School Puerto Rico so she knows she is not alone in this”. I wanted her to be surrounded by other women with similar diagnosis and hear stories of hope and meet survivors; thanks to her great friends, Ita came to Cervivor School Puerto Rico and we reconnected.

Maria and Ita at Cervivor School: Puerto Rico 11/19/16

She looked thinner and weaker than I remembered but she still had that great smile! I asked her how she felt and she said “¡En victoria!”; she still had it in her, she was still that ray of light!

That is exactly who Ita was: a ray of light! Ever since I can remember she has been a ray of light! I honestly cannot recall a time I saw her without that smile. I look at her photos and there it is — the big smile. She was so positive and hopeful and this cancer did not change that in her; not matter how bad it got, she still smiled and cared for others. She set the bar high for the rest of us.

I wanted Ita to heal. I wanted her to be a survivor, I wanted her to be done with chemo and recover her strength and live a long life. I wanted that so badly, her friends and family wanted that so badly for her; but cervical cancer took Ita from this world.

As her family and friends say their final goodbyes; I find myself an ocean away thinking of how I will remember this girl I met in my childhood and with whom I shared many fun times but also a bond I never wanted to share with anyone: cervical cancer. I know I’m going to remember her smile, that’s just impossible to forget; but I will also remember her as a woman of incredible faith, a fearless warrior, my brave Cervivor sister who didn’t lose this fight but showed us how to fight with strength, faith, hope, and a smile in the face. RIP querida guerrera, until we meet again.

Maria Franklin is a Cervivor School graduate and ambassador. Read her story here

From Mother To Mother

I would like to address (without attacking) all the concerned mothers out there who have recently read into all the false information regarding the Gardasil vaccine.

First of all, I would like to say I understand why some mother’s are hesitant to give their children the vaccine. After reading the intent of these articles, who wouldn’t be. But let me reassure you the vaccine is safe and millions of pre-teens receive it every year.

shutterstock_186335381-375x250I feel with so much false information circulating social media it’s easy to believe these stories. For example, I just read an article claiming how Dr. Diane Harper was the “leading researcher” for Gardasil and Cervarix, this information is totally false and also claiming how children don’t need the vaccine. Dr. Diane Harper backs that statement up by telling mother’s across the world that our bodies “can clear the infection in 2 years”.

When actually, researchers don’t truly know if our bodies fight it off completely. We also don’t know why one will develop cancer and another won’t. It’s so dangerous to me that someone with no scientific proof of these alleged injuries caused by Gardasil could urge mother’s to look into the vaccine before vaccinating their children to PREVENT cancer. Let me also remind you, anyone can report a side effect that may have absolutely nothing to do with the Gardasil vaccine. We have to be better advocates for our children, we need to get the facts and not some Internet medical bologna.

I would urge women to go the CDC.GOV /HPV.com for accurate information regarding the Gardasil vaccine and HPV-RELATED cancers.

PicSayPro$201f50903_101111-picsayI knew very little about HPV, nothing of cervical cancer or all the other cancers HPV can cause. In 2006, I actually denied the Gardasil vaccine because I too was misinformed. Let’s fast forward to 2014, after never missing a Pap smear or ever having an abnormal Pap smear, I was diagnosed with stage 2A1 cervical cancer. I couldn’t believe it, I was so pissed and after all isn’t it preventable with annual Paps? I was so angry, I pulled all my medical records and contacted an attorney right away. How could I? I was healthy and took care of myself, I feel when tragedies happen to us we naturally want to hold someone or something accountable. I now have recurrent cervical cancer and currently, there’s no cure. I would do ANYTHING to protect my children, I would die for my children and coincidentally I’m fighting for my life; for my children. I will be vaccinating both of my boy’s to prevent HPV-related cancers, genital warts and to also protect their future partners.

I too was misinformed and not vaccinated. I would give anything to have Gardasil available when I was a pre-teen. The numbers of HPV infections are dropping, the vaccine works guys so protect your children. Cancer is horrible and HPV doesn’t discriminate.

Please talk to your pediatrician or better yet, call the CDC. Too many people are suffering from the affects of HPV. Get your info from a reliable source and not some hocus pocus on the Internet. Ask yourself why are we denying science and why have we become a generation who is opposed to vaccines that have been saving lives for decades? There is no hidden agenda, vaccines work.

Don’t you want to protect your children from potential cancer? I do…

Jillian Scalfani is a #Cervivor of cervical cancer, not once but twice and she’s currently in remission and her goal is to educate and empower women on the facts of HPV and HPV-related cancers. 

She is a long time Massachusetts resident, mother of two and a hairdresser. She enjoys spending her time with her family and friend’s as each day is a gift and takes nothing for granted.